finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
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