i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
