Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
