OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
