so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
Randomize
