your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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