Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
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