i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
Randomize
