Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Randomize
