Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
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