Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
Randomize
