Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
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