So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
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