Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
you tried to scramble eggs in my dryer last night. i want you here in 15 minutes to clean this shit up
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
Randomize
