so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
Hey just wanted to let you know my nose is broken and I have a fractured wrist. I told you it wasn't a slip and slide.
Dude I didn't think you'd do it. I mean come on, who puts a slip and slide on their driveway?
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
Randomize
