Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
Randomize
