he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
Randomize