I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
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