You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
