More tranny stories later!
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
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