but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Randomize
