Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
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