spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
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