just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
