and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
