belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
