I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
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