i just wanna soil my oats bro
Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Randomize
