You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
Randomize
