Whats the glycemic index on semen?
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
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