thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
There was a lot of him and a little penis
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
Randomize
