she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
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