so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
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