well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Randomize
