so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
