I got chris browned last night
I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
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