babies were throwing up all over the place
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
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