Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
Randomize
