I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
