I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize
