In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Randomize
