i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Randomize
