Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
