all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
Randomize
