I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
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