Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
I need to wash the frat house off of me
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize
