Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
Randomize
