i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
Randomize
