Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
Bring me that man meat
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
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