why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
